ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.