the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize