I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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