Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Sext me about skeletons
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.