Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.