Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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