i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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