Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize