If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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