does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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