p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.