You work out of a Hotel?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
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