Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
