The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..