Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a naked man in my car right now.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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