How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words: eviction party
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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