Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
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i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
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The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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