): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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