he wants to bone in the snuggie
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
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Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
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Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs