I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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