i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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