He disabled his match.com account in front of me
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize