my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.