if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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