Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I'm like, not good at living.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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