Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I need moral support for this bender
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
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