Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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