We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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