worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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