I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize