if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Randomize