real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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