You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
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He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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