FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.