Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
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since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
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He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session