We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize