glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize