maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.