I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
