i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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