Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I think people are normalizing furries
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
