Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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