I'll bet she douches with gravy.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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