My room smells like vodka and shame
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here