I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
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After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
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You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE