Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers

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(937): View more from Ohio

do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good

Fav 2 1690 891
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(563): View more from Iowa

Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.

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(858): View more from California

I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake

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(360): View more from Washington

He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn

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(208): View more from Idaho

I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?

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(813): View more from Florida

I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.

(727): View more from Florida

Who says it wasn't?

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed

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