do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
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Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
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I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I am available for nakedness
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.