she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian