Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize