I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i don't like sucking hair
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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