he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize