Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan